Here’s What My Brother Is (Not!) Getting Me For My Birthday

Every day, when I hear Mr Postman deliver, I eagerly trot down to the box to remove what surely must be arriving any day now: a birthday parcel from my brother.

Alas, I am every time disappointed; the fated package is yet to arrive.

Since my brother is the world’s very worst answerer-of-FaceTime calls, I’m going to use this entry to send a tiny nugget of information. I am assuming Bernard, that you’re birthday shopping for me is completed. As such, I can only imagine that you must have purchased for me the following item:

Carded-ColonelCracken-bluray

As a Star Wars fan yourself, I have no doubt that Colonel Cracken is as beloved a character to you as he is me. Who can forget the battle against the Imperial Fleet in Jedi, when Lando and Nien Numb courageously flew the Millenium Falcon into the incomplete second Death Star to destroy it? True fans such as you and me surely know that success was in no small part due to the valiance of Airen Cracken, who was a crew member on that flight. As such, I have no doubt that the (long overdue!) action figure of the man himself shot to the very top of the list of items you surely wanted to give me to celebrate my birthday.

Alas, it is with a heavy heart that I must say that you’re going to have to return the one you bought, since I myself purchase this very figure today! It even now rests on my desk in a place of great pride.

And next time answer FaceTime when I call, so we can avoid these mixups in the future 😉

One Response to “Here’s What My Brother Is (Not!) Getting Me For My Birthday”

  1. mycroft says:

    I’m looking forward to the action figures of actors who unsuccessfully auditioned for roles in the films.