Ramen 17: Chicken Down Under

Please understand I’m trying these chicken ramens so you don’t have to…

Coles Chicken Flavored Noodles (1650 kJ, 16.6 g fat, 1316 mg sodium)

Without a doubt I prefer cup ramens to bricks these days, so this store brand had a steep hill to climb. And it barely tried: the noodles were weirdly sticky and the ‘taste’ was just herby salt.

I’ve formed a theory that the Australian ‘chicken’ taste is quite different from the US one, since none of those taste anything like the ones I eat in America. To me they taste more of earth and beef and, in this case, something I don’t want to eat: 0/10

Simple Chicken Noodles (1300 kJ, 13.3 g fat, 1100 mg sodium)

At this point – with five antipodean noodles under my belt – I was beginning to despair. I eat a Gefen cup almost every day back home; would nothing down here even attempt to come close to the glory of that pristine taste?

‘Sinple’ is the Aldi store brand, and to cut to the chase, I hated it. Once again I tasted soil and ash and burned toast. Do they even know what chickens are here in Oz???! Score: 1/10

Fantastic Chicken Noodles (1600 kJ, 17.1 g fat, 1890 mg sodium)

This is a larger size of the Fantastic one I tasted last week, which I proclaimed as one of the worst ramen I’d ever tasted and scored it a generous -8/10. I’ll give you one guess how much I enjoyed eating it again.

Let’s put it this way: My ethics and honor mean that I buy every (plain) chicken ramen I ever see and taste them all. Even if I know or even suspect I won’t like one I’ll still give it a go. Last week I bought both Fantastic ramens at the same time, and of course had no idea I’d hate them both. I’ll say now, hand on heart, that if I found this second one after I’d eaten the first I would have pretended I hadn’t seen it and walked away. An easy -10/10

Between these three we have an average score of -3/10, and I despair for Australians that are sold this dreck. And yet I’ve got three more to try so all hope is not yet lost. Stay tuned…

Comments are closed.