Archive for the ‘Art’ Category

The Tale of Mycroft and Stocking

Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

Have you heard of Avalon Island? If not, then you’re missing out because a diverse group of citizens is really making it an interesting place to live.

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That’s the latest census shot. Take a close look at the front row. There are some familiar faces there! There’s a dude that looks like me, a girl that looks like KLS, and people that look like Adam, Bernard and Florence. Very weird place, Avalon is. You’ll also note a diverse range of other citizens including Einstein, David Bowie, Ali G and even Admiral Ackbar. What an island!!

The islanders have many talents, and I’m particularly interested in their musical abilities. It didn’t take long for instance for Florry and Severus Snape (who must have moved here from Hogwarts) to form a band and start recording techno music. I present the first single by ‘Dark Artists’ named Operation Robodachi:

Now that’s talent! And not only can Florry sing, but she’s also a yoga savant!

But let’s get to the matter at hand, which is a chronologue of a recent ultra-dramatic event that occured on Avalon.

Meet Stocking (of Panty & Stocking fame), here shown in one of her daily jobs as a newsreader:

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Cute isn’t she? Anyway she came to me and said she had a mad crush on Mycroft (the guy that looks like Adam). I was not surprised by this, since I had already seen the latest poll of all the girls on the island:

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Woah, there’s something about those top three guys that just get the female hearts fluttering! I wonder what it could be?

Anyway, I told Stocking to go for it. “Be cute”, I said, “and confess to Mycroft on the beach!”. And she did…

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He was silent for a moment… and then he said…

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OMG!!! He spurned her! Or, in her own words:

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Poor stocking.

So what happened? Why was such a cute girl rejected by the islands most eligible bachelor? Well the answer is quite simply really. Mycroft has no time for love, since he has sold his soul to rock-and-roll. Behold, the debut single of the new Avalon metal trio The Three Kings:

OMG what talent! Could pop princess Florry have competition for the Avalon charts? And what does she think of the Mycroft x Stocking drama? When asked, her only response was:

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The Met

Sunday, May 25th, 2014

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That’s a view of the city from Central Park. We were on our way to The Metropolitan Museum of Art, which is one of the worlds foremost art museums. I’d never been, and KLS couldn’t remember ever being, and after today we can hardly believe it took us so long!

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That’s a Van Gogh, one of a roomful, itself a single room in the modern French section which included many paintings from all the masters. It was mind boggling, and you could spend half a day here alone! But this was only a tiny part of the museums collection of two million items.

They have Asian art, including an entire calligraphy section:

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American art including many Tiffany windows:

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An incredible collection of arms and armour:

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A massive Egyptian section including an entire temple (‘The Temple of Dendur’) that was transported from Egypt and is now displayed in a massive hall:

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They have ancient roman sculpture (SO much of it!):

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Collections of antique furniture:

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Ancient Indian art:

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And more, and more, and so much more. We spent five hours at the Met, and maybe saw 25% of the collection. You could spend many days here if you wanted to see everything!

Oh and the cafeteria was quite good!

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As I said yesterday, the city is crazy popular this weekend and The Met was no exception. Amongst this crowd of art appreciators was an actual artist:

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He was very good!

So what were our favourites? We were both big fans of the hyper-realistic oil paintings, such as this one by Jean Leon Gerome that was painted over 150 years ago:

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The paintings are displayed in a way that let’s you get very close to them. In the piece above, we just couldn’t see brush strokes. It was a work of mind-boggling talent!

I also very much liked the decorative armour, including this piece that would look right at home on the pages of the manga Berserk:

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But my absolute favourite was this piece, named Springtime:

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I liked this so much I bought a poster of it and will frame it. The face of the girl stole my heart 😉

The Met is incredible. Go see it; you won’t be disappointed!

Master Of Puzzles

Thursday, May 8th, 2014

It’s time I revealed another of my secret skills: Puzzle Master!

But I’m not one of those half-men that only solves puzzles. No my friends, I have now become adept at creating puzzles.  My brain-twisters will be a challenge for all non-genii, and should provide endless hours of entertainment to those that cannot count themselves among the hallowed brethren of the puzzle savants.

Curious to test and see where you rank in the world of puzzlers? Try this one first (you can print the full-sized version):

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Good luck working out what that is without finishing it!

But of course I know there are some real smart alecks reading this blog, and I’m sure one or two of you may even be able to finish the above without more than 3 or 4 mistakes. Lest your heads swell, I’ve decided to present you with another of my creations to show you just how lofty the halls of the Gods Of Puzzling are…

And so! One of my greatest creations: a ‘god tier‘ difficulty (and quite positively Laytonesque) Picross for you to solve:

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Print it and solve it! Send me a photo of the completed puzzle for a mystery prize! (If you don’t know how to solve Picross puzzles, read this)

Good luck 🙂

Drawing From Memory

Thursday, April 24th, 2014

I have recently read various articles about psychological drawing tests and drawing contests on various websites that have inspired me to test my own from-memory drawing skills. Since he was the topic of several of the drawing challenges that went around the internet, and since he is a well-known character recognizable by almost anyone, my first topic was Homer Simpson.

I had to draw him from memory, and here is my version compared to the original:

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I’ll have to be very honest and say there is something very ‘off’ about my version of Homer. It’s as if the beloved character mated with Donald Duck to produce a hybrid creature, since even the fact I nailed (?) the eyes (only!) hardly compensates for the beak, degenerate ear and horsetails growing out of the top of his head.

It would seem my from-memory skills were not as good as they could be. How would I do with other, perhaps more well-known (by me) characters? To find out, KLS gave me three challenges, which I’ll now present in order.

The first was Keroro from Keroro Gunso, unquestionable one of my favourite characters. I love the design of this little frog, which is simple, clean and unforgettable, especially to a great fan like myself. Here’s how I did:

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Oh my! The assembly of dozens of Keroro model kits seem to have ingrained his chest emblem into my mind, but when it came to drawing him from memory I seriously struggled to remember what his head looked like! I can hardly believe I forgot the hat and the chin, not to mention the way I destroyed his eyes. Let’s face it, I drew a light-bulb! Across from my desk I have hung a Keroro mask on my wall for many years now. To not remember what it looked like is shameful.

What about another manga character? Someone even more iconic than Keroro, known and beloved by virtually every manga fan in the world? Dear readers, I present to you – from Dragonball Z – Goku himself:

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Goodness gracious! While the more generous critics may point to the fact that I somewhat captured the spirit of the character in (very) broad strokes, the more honest would say that even the hair is a pale shadow of Goku’s actual hair and no other aspect of the drawing resembles the famous character. This is a disaster, through and through.

Now at this point you’re thinking: “He’s just having us on!” And I assure you I am not. I really tried to draw these characters as closely as possible to how I remembered them. But as history has shown time and time again, I can’t draw.

So I assure you that when I sat down to sketch Mickey Mouse I tried my hardest to produce a work that closely resembled the character beloved by everyone:

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It’s those teeth that will likely cause the most nightmares 😉

The Flatwoods Monster

Tuesday, March 25th, 2014

It’s been a while since a cryptid post, so today I introduce…The Flatwoods Monster!

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In 1952 some children and their parent, investigating what they believed was a UFO crash, saw something resembling the above sketch in the woods near the town of Flatwoods, in West Virginia. The monster briefly menaced them before fleeing to its UFO. The children and adult ran screaming and despite many searches no further evidence of the monster was found.

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Despite this being very likely a misidentified barn own as a result of hysteria, the so-called Flatwoods Monster has entered into the UFO/Cryptid lexicon and far, far outlived it’s very brief 15 seconds of fame. Crackpot theories include such things as it being a member of the lizard race from inner Earth, an angel (or demon), a conventional ‘grey’ alien piloting an antigravity suit and the (rather mundane) possibility it was indeed exactly as seen – a representative of a hitherto unknown alien race. The Flatwoods encounter may have also inspired the ‘black oil’ as seen on The X-Files (due to ‘moving oil’ residue allegedly found at the scene) and almost certainly (since it was widely reported) contributed to the fear amongst some that UFOs and their alien inhabitants may be hostile in nature (enforced by the Hopkinsville Goblin encounters three years later).

In short, it was the result of hysteria that would possibly inspire hysteria in others.

But – and here’s why I feature it today – the Flatwoods Monster has become a sort of alien icon in that most imaginative of places – Japan! Just as the western world has adopted ‘the greys’ as the quintessential alien blueprint, Japan has given equal status to the Flatwoods Monster, of all things. And as a result it has made many and varied appearances in Japanese popular culture.

Here’s an ‘alien poster’ from what looks like 1960s or 1970s Japan:

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Notably absent are conventional grey aliens, which is not surprising since they weren’t popularized until the late 1980s (and we can thank Whitley Streiber for that…). You can of course see our Flatwoods Monster on the lower left, along with a few other ‘famous aliens’ of the time (notably Adamski’s Venusians second from the left on the top row).

Of those shown above, the Flatwoods Monster appearance seemed to gain authority in Japan, and I’ve read that throughout the 70s and 80s whenever aliens (as in UFO inhabitants) were required they were often drawn using this appearance. This continued into game depictions of aliens, and over the years I have chuckled at the multitudes of Flatwoods Monsters I’ve seen, fought or even befriended in games!

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The above is from the anime Keroro Gunso. Here’s a few examples of the monster in games…

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That’s the penultimate boss of Tumblepop (Arcade). It’s a good depiction!

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That’s the nonhuman form of the queen from Space Harrier 2 (Genesis). The inspiration is obvious.

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The final boss of the NES game Amagon.

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The aliens from The Legend Of Zelda: Majora’s Mask (N64).

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A type of random monster encounter in Wild Arms (PS1).

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That’s a boss from the Wii U game Wonderful 101 (which I am playing right now).

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And a scary version from Elminage for the PSP (photo I took from my Vita).

So a probably-nonexistent monster seen over 60 years ago in a small American town has now become the standard alien archetype for Japanese video games. That’s a path to fame that would impress even an alien!