Category: Food

Troll Pop

June 16, 2020

This is a troll:

They’re toys that have been around for decades and are beloved by almost everyone especially my brother. While he’s never actually said anything about them, I know he adores troll toys.

Something else he loves is the K-Pop band Red Velvet, shown here:

You can imagine how excited he must have been when he heard that these two things he loved had combined into one! Yes my friends, Red Velvet were ‘in’ the recent Trolls film:

I don’t doubt Bernard threw caution to the wind and ran to the cinema to see this film but since I loathe trolls and am ambivalent toward Red Velvet I barely gave the movie a thought. However a particular piece of licensing did catch my eye, and that was these Oreos:

Green-cream Oreos with glitter and popping candy?!? This is what it means to live in the 21st century!

So many cookies with delicious sugary cream. Don’t you just want to try one? You can even enjoy them in four different designs:

What are they like? In a word: heavenly. The slightly chemical taste of the cream is completely overridden by the astonishing experience of the poprocks and the thought that even though it’s not visible you’re eating glitter as well:

During lockdown I religiously bought a pack of these every two weeks and we wolfed them down like starving beasts. Alas they are now gone from our stores, another victim of corona. They’ll never be forgotten.

If you happen to find a pack on shelves in your area don’t hesitate to buy them. These are by a very wide margin the best Oreos ever, and highly recommended 🙂

Meat Boats

May 9, 2020

It’s time for some lockdown cooking! As with most of the world we’re eating every meal at home, and as a result my culinary skills have evolved to the next level. Today I’ll share a new recipe I’m calling meat boats!

Here’s what you need:

As you can see, we don’t skimp on quality in this house! As the name suggests this recipe requires a fifth ingredient as well, and you start by heating it in a pan:

I’m using 1/4 lb of 93% ground beef. That’s enough for one person, but the recipe is of course scalable if you want to host a dinner party. Cook the meat on high until it’s done, adding a trace (a few atoms is enough) of taco seasoning so as not to cloud the meaty taste.

While the beef is simmering heat the tortilla bowls in a microwave, then add a light dusting of cheese:

Carefully add the meat while it’s steaming hot to melt the cheese. Never forget taste is half visual, so make sure it looks good:

The last ingredient is the lettuce. Don’t overdo this; again you don’t want to overwhelm the beef experience:

And you’re done! Here’s the final restaurant-quality dish with a side of lime corn chips:

Looks delicious doesn’t it!?! But the truth is in the tasting and…

They got the thumbs up! They were beefy and dry, like little meat sandwiches. Easy to make; easier to eat.

Meat Boats: why not try them yourself?

Bricklaying

April 19, 2020

Like everyone else, we’re baking in lockdown! The first time was a bit of a failure and this weekend was attempt two.

Here’s the ingredients for kaiser rolls:

Activate the yeast, then toss most of the above into the mixer for 8 minutes:

Until it looks like this:

Then let it sit for an hour to rise:

Then form the rolls, which will then sit for another hour before cooking:

Then it was time to bake for 15 minutes at 425F. Here’s the before/after:

They look ok don’t they!?! But they were a bit dense and even – dare I say – rubbery.

They tasted like a scone and not a roll. And they got hard quickly. By the end of the day they were doorstops! KLS managed to salvage one for breakfast this morning but they’ll be squirrel food!

Next time she’ll try another recipe. Any suggestions?

Robot Claw